As I near the end of the third quarter in my Counseling program, I have just completed an assignment that initially seemed straightforward yet stirred my emotions: writing a one-page obituary. While it will be kept for my professor’s eyes alone, this activity has pushed me to consider the temporary nature of life and reflect on the legacy I hope to leave behind.
Writing my own obituary evoked a cascade of feelings. Sadness emerged as I grappled with the reality of death. Life is fleeting. Yet, thoughts about the legacy I want to leave behind also evoked a sense of hope. This exercise pushed me to consider the importance of crafting a life filled with purpose and impact.
This reflection on mortality extends beyond my personal life into my professional journey as a therapist in training. As I prepare to support others through their own experiences of aging and death, I am acutely aware of the balance between acknowledging the inevitability of loss and fostering resilience. The process of aging is often fraught with uncertainty, but it also offers opportunities for growth, wisdom, and deeper connections.
A common fear that many people face as they age is the potential loss of autonomy. The possibility of no longer being able to make decisions about one’s own life due to cognitive decline or physical issues can be terrifying. This fear is not unfounded, as conditions like dementia and severe physical ailments can strip individuals of their independence. However, this awareness also offers an opportunity to be proactive and intentional about our future. As I prepare to become a licensed therapist, I am particularly mindful of the importance of supporting clients in their late adulthood.
In my future practice, I hope to support my clients through these complex emotions, helping them navigate the existential questions that arise with age. How do we find meaning in the face of death? How can we honor our past while embracing the unknown future? As a therapist, my role is to offer a compassionate presence, walking alongside my clients as they find their own answers and chart their path through life’s inevitable transitions.
As I look ahead to the next stages of my life, I find comfort in the idea of intentional living. Being intentional means making deliberate choices that align with our values and priorities, especially as we prepare for the future. One of the most important steps we can take is to engage in advance care planning. This involves making decisions about the types of medical care we would want (or not want) if we were unable to speak for ourselves. Creating an advance directive and designating a healthcare proxy ensures that our wishes are respected and alleviates the burden on our loved ones. Reflecting on the meaning of our lives can bring a sense of peace and fulfillment. This could involve looking back at our experiences and finding ways to share our wisdom with younger generations.
In contemplating my mortality, I think about the impact we can have on others. Whether through a kind word, a thoughtful gesture, or the quiet message of a planted tree, our actions touch lives in ways we may never fully comprehend. By facing my mortality, I am unlocking a deeper commitment to leaving a positive legacy that resonates long after I am gone. In the end, it is not the length of our lives that matters most, but the depth of our impact. For me, that impact will be measured in the hearts I touch as I help others navigate their own journeys toward understanding, acceptance, and peace.
I will see you next week!
Roque Neto 