Hi! I’m in a cohort with Roque at Palo Alto University in the Counseling program. He asked me to do a guest blog, and I decided to share with y’all about what brought me to the program. If you’re reading this, you’re probably a pretty cool person for knowing Roque, or very discerning and intelligent, of course. It’s been a pleasure being in classes with him, getting to know him, and see the world through his eyes. Thank you for your time, and hope you enjoy!
My journey to the world of counseling has been a pretty long one, now that I think about it. In high school and college, I was always interested in psychology, but never seriously considered it as a legitimate career for myself. It always felt, not “for me,” but I could never really put my finger on why. I spent almost 20 years working in hospitality, mostly behind the bar, providing amateur therapy for patrons always qualifying with, “I’m not a licensed professional, please seek a mental health professional!”
Like so many others, the year 2020 threw me for a loop, and I finally decided to seek out my own mental health professional. We met for about a year, and by the end of that much of my distress was related to my job. I’d long tried to find some kind of satisfaction in my work, but it always felt, lacking, as if it was to no end. My therapist suggested I consider counseling, she remarked on my insight, empathy, and desire to help others. I shrugged it off, coming up with every excuse I could, which all really amounted to one thing: I didn’t think I deserved to. I felt unworthy.
I left it at that, stuck my head down and that was that. But truly, deep inside, the thought never left my head, the idea that I could really help someone. Many of my friends had struggled to find a therapist, mainly because the waitlist for someone who is LGBTQIA+ friendly or takes a sliding scale, or low income is so long. I was lucky to have found one when I did. It all felt so unfair, so many people being disenfranchised. I felt, and still feel, the pain of those around me as we attempt to muddle through daily lives while it can feel like the world around us is burning.
I believe that the salve to these wounds is through collective liberation, and part of that means that we all have a part to play, and I wasn’t playing mine. I’m not choosing to become a counselor because I think it will help me heal my own wounds, though maybe it will, I’m here because I have a responsibility to my community to be of service. The world we live in is hard, and it’s scary, and we don’t know what the future holds. I chose Palo Alto University because of its focus on social justice and intersectionality. I hope to use the skills I learn to strengthen those who feel like there’s no one in their corner, to inspire those who need greater compassion, and to hold space for those who’ve experienced trauma.
I certainly don’t think of myself as some kind of hero, savior, or anything of that nature. But, like Mercury Stardust says, “you’re worth the time it takes to learn a new skill.” Really, you should be following her, @mercurystardusttopz, I digress. What I learned during my time with a counselor was how important it is to live according to your values. For me, that means fighting for fairness, equity, and community. In my experience, one person can have an incredible impact on those around them, both in a positive and negative manner. My hope is not just to have my own positive impact, but to help others have their own.
Roque Neto 